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EPISODES

  • Series 1

    • 01 - The Serpents Tooth
    • 02 - A Pain In The Class
    • 03 - Droit De Seigneur
    • 04 - The Last Resort
    • 05 - A Farewell to Alarms
    • 06 - Death Takes a Policy
    • 07 - The Awkward Phase
    • 08 - Much Ado About Ben
  • Series 2

    • 01 - All Roads Lead to Ramon
    • 02 - The Unkindest Cut
    • 03 - Parisian Beauty
    • 04 - Trust Never Sleeps
    • 05 - Death & Ben Take a Holiday
    • 06 - Driving Miss Crazy
    • 07 - I Second That Emulsion
    • 08 - The Age of Romance
    • 09 - Get Cartier
    • 10 - Tis A Pity She's A Whore
    • 11 - The Last Supper
    • 12 - Ben Wants A Millionaire
    • 13 - Breakable
  • Series 3

    • 01 - Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey
    • 02 - Shrink Rap
    • 03 - Desperately Squeezing Susan
    • 04 - Of Mice & Ben
    • 05 - Imperfect Strangers
    • 06 - The Second Greatest Story Ever Told
    • 07 - Waiting To Inhale
    • 08 - Misery
    • 09 - Auto Erotica
    • 10 - A Handful of Dust
    • 11 - The Lost Weekend
    • 12 - Ghosts
    • 13 - One Flew Out of The Cuckoo's Nest
    • Ding Dong Merrily (Christmas Special)
  • Series 4

    • 01 - Fitting Punishment
    • 02 - They Shoot Harper's Don't They
    • 03 - The Great Escape
    • 04 - Return of The Prodigal Prat
    • 05 - Owed To Susan
    • 06 - Deliverance
    • 07 - Blind Justice
    • 08 - Friday The 31st (Halloween)
    • 09 - Sitting Targets
    • 10 - Loco Parentis
    • 11 - The Canary Cage (Lanzarote)
    • 12 - May The Best Man Win
    • 13 - It's A Window Filled Life
    • Sixty Feet Under (Christmas Special)
  • Series 5

    • 01 - My Family Reloaded 'Special'
    • 02 - The Mummy Returns
    • 03 - You Don't Know Jack
    • 04 - What's Up Docklands?
    • 05 - Luck Be A Lady Tonight
    • 06 - First Past The Post
    • 07 - My Will Be Done
    • 08 - My Fair Charlady
    • 09 - The Mouthtrap
    • 10 - While You Were Sleeping
    • 11 - Dentist To The Stars
    • 12 - A Wife Less Ordinary
    • 13 - The Book of Love
    • 14 - Going Dental
    • 15 - Glad Tidings We Bring (Hour Long Christmas Special)
  • Series 6

    • 01 - ...and I'll Cry if I Want To
    • 02 - Bliss for Idiots
    • 03 - The Spokes Person
    • 04 - Dentally Unstable
    • 05 - Living the Dream
    • 06 - An Embarrassments of Susans
    • 07 - And Other Animals
    • 08 - The Art of Being Susan
  • Series 7

    • The Heart of Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Ego Has Landed
    • 02 - Four Affairs and a Funeral
    • 03 - Once More with Feeling
    • 04 - Dutch Art and Dutch Courage
    • 05 - Susan of Troy
    • 06 - One of the Boys
    • 07 - Abi Ever After
    • 08 - Breaking Up Ain't Hard to Do
    • 09 - Life Begins at Fifty
  • Series 8

    • Ho Ho No (Hour Christmas Special)
    • 01 - The Parent Trap
    • 02 - Let's Not Be Heisty
    • 03 - Cards on the Table
    • 04 - The Wax Job
    • 05 - Neighbour Wars
    • 06 - Can't Get No Satisfaction
    • 07 - The Abi Habit
  • Series 9

    • It's a Gift (Christmas Special)
    • Harpers and Queen (New Years Special)
    • 01 - Bully for Ben
    • 02 - Bringing Up Janey
    • 03 - A Very Brief Encounter
    • 04 - A Difficult Undertaking
    • 05 - The Psyche of Mikey
    • 07 - Dog Dazed
    • 08 - It's Training Men
    • 09 - The Guru
    • 10 - Kenzo's Project
  • Series 10

    • The Fight Before Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Wheelie Ben
    • 02 - The Son'll Come Out
    • 03 - Desperately Stalking Susan
    • 10 - The Melbourne Identity
    • 05 - He's Just Not That Into Ben
    • 06 - Slammertime
    • 07 - Ben Behaving Badly
    • 08 - Mary Christmas
  • Series 11

    • 01 - Janey's Choice
    • 02 - Labour Pains
    • 03 - Accusin' Susan
    • 04 - Germs of Endearment
    • 05 - Harper vs. Harper
    • 06 - Relationship Happens
    • 07 - Facebooked
    • 08 - A Decent Proposal
    • 09 - Darts All Folks
    • 11 - A Night Out
    • Neighbour Wars II (Hour Long Special)

S03E10 – A Handful of Dust

Ben gets a surprise when his birthday is forgotten.
  • Episode Summary

    • It is Ben’s birthday and no one has organised anything for him, not even a surprise breakfast. They all know about it but he had told everyone he didn’t want any fuss. Nick has become a gorilla-gram. Even Ben’s mother hasn’t done anything for Ben’s birthday. Ben has got himself a present, all wrapped, from Ben to Ben. It is the soil from Wembley penalty area, 1966. In a box. They all mock him, it plays Match of the day, when the lid is lifted. Susan tells Ben that she has a lovely surprise. Janey is coming for the weekend. With a friend. Ben is expecting a lout and they worry about where they are going to sleep. Janey has brought a friend home, but it is not a lout, it is a lesbian. They are still worried about where they will sleep. Abi now has Janey’s room, so Susan gives them their room. Ben and Susan pretend they are okay with this new development. They think of famous lesbians to make themselves feel better. Ben is still thrilled with his soil and doesn’t want to tell Nick what it is in case he laughs at him. Nick thinks it a terrific scam. Ben & Susan, now on the sofa bed, try to come to terms with Janey being a lesbian. Susan sends Ben upstairs for her toothbrush, although she really wants to know what they are doing. Ben comes back and says he couldn’t find the toothbrush. Susan is desperate to know what they were doing. She says he must go back, he says the toothbrush isn’t there, because she already has it. Ben now has a headache, Susan tells him the aspirins are in the bathroom! Nick has been paid to find out if Janey is gay. Michael wants to know what they actually do! Janey would like to borrow the car and two thousand pounds so she can go back packing to find herself. Janey had assumed that if they thought she was gay, they would have paid for her to go backpacking, only it hasn’t worked. Kate tells her she is shallow and leaves. Janey wants to talk to Ben and Susan, and they expect she is going to tell them she is a lesbian, but she tells them she is shallow! Ben is now cross that she is not a lesbian. Having wound them up. Finally there is a birthday celebration, with the gorilla at the table. Then Nick arrives as a vicar, he is now a vicar gram. The gorilla was a Nick substitute. Nick arrives home with a new friend, and says it’s going to cost them £50.00 to find out.
  • Cast

    • Character

      Actor

      Ben Harper
      Robert Lindsay
      Susan Harper
      Zoë Wanamaker
      Nick Harper
      Kris Marshall
      Michael Harper
      Gabriel Thompson
      Janey Harper
      Daniela Denby-Ashe
      Abi Harper
      Siobhan Hayes

      Character

      Actor

      Kate
      Catherine Bailey
  • Team

    • Role

      Name

      Director
      Dewi Humphreys
      Writer
      Ian Brown
      Writer
      James Hendrie
      Producer
      John Bartlett
      Exec. Producer
      Don Taffner
      Exec. Producer
      Fred Barron

DLT

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