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EPISODES

  • Series 1

    • 01 - The Serpents Tooth
    • 02 - A Pain In The Class
    • 03 - Droit De Seigneur
    • 04 - The Last Resort
    • 05 - A Farewell to Alarms
    • 06 - Death Takes a Policy
    • 07 - The Awkward Phase
    • 08 - Much Ado About Ben
  • Series 2

    • 01 - All Roads Lead to Ramon
    • 02 - The Unkindest Cut
    • 03 - Parisian Beauty
    • 04 - Trust Never Sleeps
    • 05 - Death & Ben Take a Holiday
    • 06 - Driving Miss Crazy
    • 07 - I Second That Emulsion
    • 08 - The Age of Romance
    • 09 - Get Cartier
    • 10 - Tis A Pity She's A Whore
    • 11 - The Last Supper
    • 12 - Ben Wants A Millionaire
    • 13 - Breakable
  • Series 3

    • 01 - Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey
    • 02 - Shrink Rap
    • 03 - Desperately Squeezing Susan
    • 04 - Of Mice & Ben
    • 05 - Imperfect Strangers
    • 06 - The Second Greatest Story Ever Told
    • 07 - Waiting To Inhale
    • 08 - Misery
    • 09 - Auto Erotica
    • 10 - A Handful of Dust
    • 11 - The Lost Weekend
    • 12 - Ghosts
    • 13 - One Flew Out of The Cuckoo's Nest
    • Ding Dong Merrily (Christmas Special)
  • Series 4

    • 01 - Fitting Punishment
    • 02 - They Shoot Harper's Don't They
    • 03 - The Great Escape
    • 04 - Return of The Prodigal Prat
    • 05 - Owed To Susan
    • 06 - Deliverance
    • 07 - Blind Justice
    • 08 - Friday The 31st (Halloween)
    • 09 - Sitting Targets
    • 10 - Loco Parentis
    • 11 - The Canary Cage (Lanzarote)
    • 12 - May The Best Man Win
    • 13 - It's A Window Filled Life
    • Sixty Feet Under (Christmas Special)
  • Series 5

    • 01 - My Family Reloaded 'Special'
    • 02 - The Mummy Returns
    • 03 - You Don't Know Jack
    • 04 - What's Up Docklands?
    • 05 - Luck Be A Lady Tonight
    • 06 - First Past The Post
    • 07 - My Will Be Done
    • 08 - My Fair Charlady
    • 09 - The Mouthtrap
    • 10 - While You Were Sleeping
    • 11 - Dentist To The Stars
    • 12 - A Wife Less Ordinary
    • 13 - The Book of Love
    • 14 - Going Dental
    • 15 - Glad Tidings We Bring (Hour Long Christmas Special)
  • Series 6

    • 01 - ...and I'll Cry if I Want To
    • 02 - Bliss for Idiots
    • 03 - The Spokes Person
    • 04 - Dentally Unstable
    • 05 - Living the Dream
    • 06 - An Embarrassments of Susans
    • 07 - And Other Animals
    • 08 - The Art of Being Susan
  • Series 7

    • The Heart of Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Ego Has Landed
    • 02 - Four Affairs and a Funeral
    • 03 - Once More with Feeling
    • 04 - Dutch Art and Dutch Courage
    • 05 - Susan of Troy
    • 06 - One of the Boys
    • 07 - Abi Ever After
    • 08 - Breaking Up Ain't Hard to Do
    • 09 - Life Begins at Fifty
  • Series 8

    • Ho Ho No (Hour Christmas Special)
    • 01 - The Parent Trap
    • 02 - Let's Not Be Heisty
    • 03 - Cards on the Table
    • 04 - The Wax Job
    • 05 - Neighbour Wars
    • 06 - Can't Get No Satisfaction
    • 07 - The Abi Habit
  • Series 9

    • It's a Gift (Christmas Special)
    • Harpers and Queen (New Years Special)
    • 01 - Bully for Ben
    • 02 - Bringing Up Janey
    • 03 - A Very Brief Encounter
    • 04 - A Difficult Undertaking
    • 05 - The Psyche of Mikey
    • 07 - Dog Dazed
    • 08 - It's Training Men
    • 09 - The Guru
    • 10 - Kenzo's Project
  • Series 10

    • The Fight Before Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Wheelie Ben
    • 02 - The Son'll Come Out
    • 03 - Desperately Stalking Susan
    • 10 - The Melbourne Identity
    • 05 - He's Just Not That Into Ben
    • 06 - Slammertime
    • 07 - Ben Behaving Badly
    • 08 - Mary Christmas
  • Series 11

    • 01 - Janey's Choice
    • 02 - Labour Pains
    • 03 - Accusin' Susan
    • 04 - Germs of Endearment
    • 05 - Harper vs. Harper
    • 06 - Relationship Happens
    • 07 - Facebooked
    • 08 - A Decent Proposal
    • 09 - Darts All Folks
    • 11 - A Night Out
    • Neighbour Wars II (Hour Long Special)

S02E10 – Tis A Pity She’s A Whore

Janey learns a family secret when she visits her grandmother.
  • Episode Summary

    • Ben and Susan are in bed when the phone rings at 5 a.m in the morning. It is Susan's mother inviting them to her funeral. Susan refuses to visit just because she says she is dying. Susan is making a shopping list to replace everything Nick has eaten. Janey is in a mood as someone has used all her shampoo. Michael is the culprit. Susan says she can buy six bottles as long as Janey goes to visit her grandmother. Michael is standing for election at school, as a Tory. Janey goes to visit her gran, who wants her to tell Susan she was coughing up blood so she will feel guilty and visit. Janey discovers Michael has marked all the items he wants when his granny dies. Janey starts to do the same, when her grandmother explains that Janey's great grandmother ran a brothel in the West End. She was a prostitute. The boys come home to find Ben and Susan in a clinch on the kitchen counter. Much to their disgust. Michael has made his speech and Ben is still horrified that Michael is a Tory. Janey comes home and tells the family Great Grandma was a hooker. Janey wants to tell her friends, and Michael thinks it will ruin his political career if it gets out. Ben is upset because his side of the family is boring. 'Mediocrity or death'. He retaliates with 'for a good time call' Ben looks through his photos for something about his family. He reminisces about the haberdashery shop which they owned for 4 generations in Derby. He explains all about tie knots to Nick. Ben then bores a patient and his new assistant, about his past. Ben realises he is boring after all. Susan finally visits her mother. Susan accuses her mother of just telling Janey about Grandma without consulting her so that she would visit. Michael practises for his debate with Janey and Nicks help. Ben returns and says he is dull and forgettable. Michael calls him a little man. Ben is downhearted. He decides he needs to make a statement. Michael suggests a bench. Ben is looking for a site for his bench. Michael comes home from school very upset as they knew about there being a prostitute in the family, as Janey had told them, and that he was adopted. Nick visits his grandmother much to her horror and breaks a plate. Ben visits his bench at night to take a photo of it and finds a tramp sitting on it. Two hookers then arrive and as he is offering to pay them to move a young pc arrives and arrests Ben. The next day Bens picture is in the paper, Ben is terribly upset. Susan reassures him that no one will know its him, when Susan's mother calls and asks if it is Ben.
  • Cast

    • Character

      Actor

      Ben Harper
      Robert Lindsay
      Susan Harper
      Zoë Wanamaker
      Nick Harper
      Kris Marshall
      Michael Harper
      Gabriel Thompson
      Janey Harper
      Daniela Denby-Ashe
      Rebecca
      Avril Egar

      Character

      Actor

      Dental Assistant
      Johanna Scanlan
      Hookers
      Charlotte Palmer
      Derelict
      Timothy Bateson
      Policeman
      Steven O'Neil
      Mr. Winslow
      Mark Drewey
  • Team

    • Role

      Name

      Director
      Dewi Humphreys
      Writer
      Steve Armogida
      Writer
      Jim Armogida
      Producer
      John Bartlett
      Exec. Producer
      Fred Barron
      Exec. Producer
      Don Taffner

DLT

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