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EPISODES

  • Series 1

    • 01 - The Serpents Tooth
    • 02 - A Pain In The Class
    • 03 - Droit De Seigneur
    • 04 - The Last Resort
    • 05 - A Farewell to Alarms
    • 06 - Death Takes a Policy
    • 07 - The Awkward Phase
    • 08 - Much Ado About Ben
  • Series 2

    • 01 - All Roads Lead to Ramon
    • 02 - The Unkindest Cut
    • 03 - Parisian Beauty
    • 04 - Trust Never Sleeps
    • 05 - Death & Ben Take a Holiday
    • 06 - Driving Miss Crazy
    • 07 - I Second That Emulsion
    • 08 - The Age of Romance
    • 09 - Get Cartier
    • 10 - Tis A Pity She's A Whore
    • 11 - The Last Supper
    • 12 - Ben Wants A Millionaire
    • 13 - Breakable
  • Series 3

    • 01 - Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey
    • 02 - Shrink Rap
    • 03 - Desperately Squeezing Susan
    • 04 - Of Mice & Ben
    • 05 - Imperfect Strangers
    • 06 - The Second Greatest Story Ever Told
    • 07 - Waiting To Inhale
    • 08 - Misery
    • 09 - Auto Erotica
    • 10 - A Handful of Dust
    • 11 - The Lost Weekend
    • 12 - Ghosts
    • 13 - One Flew Out of The Cuckoo's Nest
    • Ding Dong Merrily (Christmas Special)
  • Series 4

    • 01 - Fitting Punishment
    • 02 - They Shoot Harper's Don't They
    • 03 - The Great Escape
    • 04 - Return of The Prodigal Prat
    • 05 - Owed To Susan
    • 06 - Deliverance
    • 07 - Blind Justice
    • 08 - Friday The 31st (Halloween)
    • 09 - Sitting Targets
    • 10 - Loco Parentis
    • 11 - The Canary Cage (Lanzarote)
    • 12 - May The Best Man Win
    • 13 - It's A Window Filled Life
    • Sixty Feet Under (Christmas Special)
  • Series 5

    • 01 - My Family Reloaded 'Special'
    • 02 - The Mummy Returns
    • 03 - You Don't Know Jack
    • 04 - What's Up Docklands?
    • 05 - Luck Be A Lady Tonight
    • 06 - First Past The Post
    • 07 - My Will Be Done
    • 08 - My Fair Charlady
    • 09 - The Mouthtrap
    • 10 - While You Were Sleeping
    • 11 - Dentist To The Stars
    • 12 - A Wife Less Ordinary
    • 13 - The Book of Love
    • 14 - Going Dental
    • 15 - Glad Tidings We Bring (Hour Long Christmas Special)
  • Series 6

    • 01 - ...and I'll Cry if I Want To
    • 02 - Bliss for Idiots
    • 03 - The Spokes Person
    • 04 - Dentally Unstable
    • 05 - Living the Dream
    • 06 - An Embarrassments of Susans
    • 07 - And Other Animals
    • 08 - The Art of Being Susan
  • Series 7

    • The Heart of Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Ego Has Landed
    • 02 - Four Affairs and a Funeral
    • 03 - Once More with Feeling
    • 04 - Dutch Art and Dutch Courage
    • 05 - Susan of Troy
    • 06 - One of the Boys
    • 07 - Abi Ever After
    • 08 - Breaking Up Ain't Hard to Do
    • 09 - Life Begins at Fifty
  • Series 8

    • Ho Ho No (Hour Christmas Special)
    • 01 - The Parent Trap
    • 02 - Let's Not Be Heisty
    • 03 - Cards on the Table
    • 04 - The Wax Job
    • 05 - Neighbour Wars
    • 06 - Can't Get No Satisfaction
    • 07 - The Abi Habit
  • Series 9

    • It's a Gift (Christmas Special)
    • Harpers and Queen (New Years Special)
    • 01 - Bully for Ben
    • 02 - Bringing Up Janey
    • 03 - A Very Brief Encounter
    • 04 - A Difficult Undertaking
    • 05 - The Psyche of Mikey
    • 07 - Dog Dazed
    • 08 - It's Training Men
    • 09 - The Guru
    • 10 - Kenzo's Project
  • Series 10

    • The Fight Before Christmas (Hour Long Special)
    • 01 - Wheelie Ben
    • 02 - The Son'll Come Out
    • 03 - Desperately Stalking Susan
    • 10 - The Melbourne Identity
    • 05 - He's Just Not That Into Ben
    • 06 - Slammertime
    • 07 - Ben Behaving Badly
    • 08 - Mary Christmas
  • Series 11

    • 01 - Janey's Choice
    • 02 - Labour Pains
    • 03 - Accusin' Susan
    • 04 - Germs of Endearment
    • 05 - Harper vs. Harper
    • 06 - Relationship Happens
    • 07 - Facebooked
    • 08 - A Decent Proposal
    • 09 - Darts All Folks
    • 11 - A Night Out
    • Neighbour Wars II (Hour Long Special)

S03E01 – Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey

When Janey leaves for university, Ben and Susan decide what to do with her room.
  • Episode Summary

    • Susan is in the cupboard under the stairs and asks Ben if he knows where the Mr Muscle is. He pushes her into the cupboard and shuts the door. They come out dishevelled! Opening Titles: Janey is packing to go away to University. Ben is thrilled. Janey has now gone. Ben would like to have her room as a hobbies room, maybe a dark room. Susan thinks it should be kept sacrosanct. Then she changes her mind, and they race to get to Janey’s room first. When they arrive, Nick is ensconced with a huge skalextric already set up. They order him out. Susan rings Janey constantly, finally she gets her professor who hangs up on her. Michael keeps quoting from the Art of War book. Susan tells Ben he can have Janey’s room after all. Ben is ecstatic. He even tells Janey down the phone he has her room. We see Ben ruthlessly clearing out Janey's room. Nick tells Ben he has a job in a supermarket up the road. Ben goes to the other supermarket, and there is Nick sitting at the till! Nick is in trouble with the manager, because he has sent the checkout girl to lunch, so he can do the till. The manager tells him his job is to price the stock. Ben is in Janey's room quietly reading the paper. Susan thinks it’s a façade to cover up the hurt he is feeling about Janey leaving. He tells Susan he has phoned Janey and told her he misses her. Nick and Michael have taken over Ben and Susan’s bed room, and are sitting in the bed. They are ordered out, spilling a soggy sandwich in the bed on the way. The next morning, we see Nick pricing vegetables to practice his skills. He prices Michael on the head, and Ben has price stickers all over the back of his t shirt. Ben goes up to Janey’s room and finds it full of cans of tuna. Nick got a bit behind with the pricing and brought some home with him. Ben is worried that it is stealing. Nick thought he would take them back 2 at a time. Ben says Nick must return them and he will not do it for him. Ben with an old pram and case on wheels goes into the supermarket to put the tuna back. Nick draws attention to him, and he ends up being arrested for shop lifting. The family eat dinner, Janey has come back to dump her boyfriend. Ben is fed up, they are eating tuna, and will be for months and it cost him £1694.00. Nick and Michael are helping Susan decide what she needs for her room Ben finds out that Susan told him he could have Janey’s room so that he would clear it out. It is actually for her to practice her cello in.
  • Cast

    • Character

      Actor

      Ben Harper
      Robert Lindsay
      Susan Harper
      Zoë Wanamaker
      Nick Harper
      Kris Marshall
      Michael Harper
      Gabriel Thompson
      Janey Harper
      Daniela Denby-Ashe
      Shopper
      Phil Nice

      Character

      Actor

      Manager
      Gary Sefton
      Rhonda, Checkout Girl
      Alyson Coote
  • Team

    • Role

      Name

      Director
      Dewi Humphreys
      Writer
      James Hendrie
      Writer
      Ian Brown
      Producer
      John Bartlett
      Exec. Producer
      Fred Barron
      Exec. Producer
      Don Taffner

DLT

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